Well Being

My Spiritual Advisor Pt. 3

Three years ago this month, my spiritual advisor left this world, his head on my lap as I rubbed his ears. His fur was soft, and his job was done. I had become a better person. If you have been reading this column for a while, you will remember Ernie,…
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Connecting to Your Core

We all have a life-loving core self deep in the center of our being. This healthy core self wants to both express its interests and connect emotionally with other people. It creates your individuality and draws you into relationship. When we follow its inspiration, we feel balanced and whole. We…
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Emotional Immaturity

Emotional development is invisible to the eye because it is hidden by appearances. Give a man a beard and a business suit, and we assume he is as grown-up on the inside as he looks on the outside. Likewise, at first glance a full-grown woman will appear to have inner…
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Respect Your Soul

As a psychologist, I used to keep a clean line between psychological and spiritual matters. I stayed on my side and let religion handle the rest. I used psychological terms like true self instead of soul to refer to the deepest part of a person. But sometimes soul is the…
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Crossing Boundaries

Remember the expression, “No good deed goes unpunished?” To me, this is a fascinating and, on the face of it, completely illogical statement. Why would the noble intention of a good deed end up so badly when you “just wanted to help”? The answer lies in the murky world of…
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Finding Your True Self

In an ideal world, all children would have parents who helped them develop their true selves in order to grow into self-confident, independent adults. But many times the parents’ own emotional immaturity gets in the way of that mission. Parents who were not allowed to develop their own individuality don’t…
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Taking Little Risks

For the New Year, how about we overcome the little fear spots that hold us back from rewarding moments of connection with others? We can do this by understanding the source of the little fears that constrain us with other people. We can do this by taking little risks of…
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